My Writing Process Blog Tour

Sunshine makes me want to go on vacation.  (Not that there's any sunshine today, but there was last week.) So, with the sun shining, I agreed when Kristin Nador (of Kristin Nador Writes Anywhere)  invited me along on her My Writing Process Blog Tour.  

Hey, I’ll take any vacation—even a virtual one.  Would you like to join me?

Taking a break at a writing retreat

Before going on a trip, there’s always paperwork. So, here's where I earn it.

What am I working on?

Picture books.  I've written a couple of novels and was well into another, when I decided to take a detour. It feels good to travel off the beaten path for a change.

How does my work differ from other of its genre? 

Whether it's novels or picture books, I like to write about possibilities in a world where what you think you see isn't always what you get. I play with the idea of "Okay, it's not real, but why not...are you sure?"

Why do I write what I do?

I write about "the magic of everyday life" on my blog. Most of my YA work has fantastical elements with hints of magic in our regular world, which lends itself nicely to picture books. Recently, I decided to practice the “write what you know” adage.  We devour picture books in this house.  We have stacks and shelves of them. In my former life as a high school teacher, I felt that I had never really left high school. Now,  I'm living and breathing picture books.  Everywhere I turn, I see magical possibilities through the sparkling enthusiasm of my children as well as their intense, face covering drama.  Children see the world as a magical place full of possibilities, and I like the idea we share that perspective. I enjoy parallel worlds where something isn't quite what it seems.   That explains childhood pretty well.

I enjoy writing novels, but labyrinthine plot lines require large chunks of time from me.  With picture books, I can work on a single big idea. Writers go into the world to gather ideas and feed their creativity. I just have to listen to the kids' stream of consciousness chatter. I've heard of writers doing drugs to have creative injections. I have psychedelic creativity padding into my bedroom at 5:58 AM whispering, " Mom.  Mom.  I wanna tell you a story."

How does your writing process work? 

Give me tea (preferably one with bergamot), a baked good, and either a computer or journal, and I'll write. I envy people who churn out novels while chaos surrounds them. That's a challenge, but I'll take what I can get.   Still, a nice, three hour chunk is ideal. It allows me to revisit my most recent writing adventures, experience more and then review them. It's a nice vacation from life into my imaginary world. However, I usually get an hour.  I work best when I get time on a consistent basis so my brain can play with problems and possibilities for the characters before I return to the computer and write it down. I love that feeling of living my writing life in my head while I'm doing something mundane like folding laundry.

Thanks for your interest in my writing process. Mark your itinerary for next Monday when each of the following authors will tell you about her process.

Sonia Gensler is the award-winning author of THE REVENANT (2011) and THE DARK BETWEEN (2013), both from Alfred A. Knopf. She blogs a little about writing, but more often about reading, travel, TV and movies over at www.soniagensler.com.

Gayleen Rabakukk enjoys creating stories that explore the mysteries of days gone by, both real and imagined. Find her online at www.gayleenrabakukk.com

Stephanie Clinton is a mommy blogger who writes about family, food, and all that goes with it (including the hard stuff) over at Hugs, Kisses, and Snot. She will also be featured in Oklahoma City's 2014 Listen to Your Mother Show.

Happy travels!

How do you ship your art?

One of my goals for 2014 is to "ship my art." My art is writing, which means I'm going to enter contests and submit my novel to agents.

Do you have a story to tell?

Listen to Your Mother provides the opportunity for people across the country to take the stage--actual and virtual--and tell a story about motherhood. Last year I was part of Oklahoma City's debut performance. You don't have to be a mother or a woman to submit. You also don't have to go solo. Submit here. (Check back here next Friday for more on what I've done about the experience.)

Check out Oklahoma Writers Federation's contest to enter over twenty different categories for $20. Each entry gets a critique. Deadline is February 1. They also have a conference that offers useful information to newbies and professionals.

Speaking of conferences and the opportunity to meet with agents, Oklahoma has an outstanding  chapter of Society of Children Book Writers and Illustrators led by Anna Myers. We're having a conference in Oklahoma City on March 29.

If you're not a writer, what is your art? What passionate thing do you do to create change in the world? How do you ship your art?

Summer Salad: Mari Farthing

 

 

When I first met Mari Farthing, I felt like I'd met her before.  I'm not sure if it's because her name was familiar because she was a (now former) editor at MetroFamily Magazine or Senior editor at Buzz Books. She also blogs at Oklahoma Women Bloggers and Mari's Virtual Notebook and shows off her musical addiction interests at The Music Mamas. We officially met at the table reading of the Listen to Your Mother Show. 
 

We chatted. She's funny and unassuming and humble and passionate. That's when I realized Mari is just one of those people. You know...the kind you meet and it's like you've always known each other and what took so long for it to be official? After making her salad, check out her blogs.  You may feel that way about her, too.

 

 

Orzo veggie salad

1/2 box cooked orzo pasta, rinsed, drained and cooled

1 package herbed feta cheese chunks (6 oz)

1 cup of small cherry/grape tomatoes, quartered or 1 md tomato, chopped

Good handful of baby spinach, chopped

bottled Greek vinaigrette salad dressing (or Italian dressing or homemade)

Dice veggies to be of similar size:

1/2 ea: red, yellow & green bell pepper

1 md. cucumber, peeled & seeded 

1/4-1/2 red onion

Italian seasoning, salt, pepper to taste

Optional: black or Kalamata olives, pickled banana peppers, pepperoncini (all chopped in a similar to above fashion)

Combine chopped vegetables with pasta and gently toss. 

Add in seasonings at this time, plus a small amount of dressing. 

Gently combine and refrigerate for at least an hour.

Just before serving, add cheese and a little more dressing (or a lot, if you like a lot of dressing) and toss.

 

Magical Meal Combination

This is great if you're going to have Greek food, such as kebabs or souvlaki-marinated pork (the optional ingredients are a perfect tie in for Greek food), but works equally well with just about any grilled meat or as a stand-alone pasta salad. The add-ins are very flexible to what you have available; use your leftover vegetables from a previous meal, add a protein like grilled chicken or shrimp in the salad to make it a full meal. I would enjoy this with a nice Sauvignon Blanc, but then I think the only requirement for a nice Sauvignon Blanc is a lovely summer day!

Summer Salad: Heather Davis

Guess who is at our virtual potluck today, ya'll?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Minivan Momma is in the house! Heather Davis is the award winning author of 

the TMI Mom humor series.

     

She's partied with Dr. Oz, so I feel extra fancy that she's hanging out with us.
You may know her as one of the leaders of Oklahoma Women Bloggers as well
as one of the talented producers from the Listen to Your Mother Show in Oklahoma City.
Watch her video here.



How does she accomplish everything?  Stick around the party, because she's sharing
some of her magic tricks.

***

I found myself awake at 3:00am (that's the morning, y'all) just knowing I had

forgotten something. I just knew it, but I didn't know what it was. Later that 

same morning, when we were trying to get out the door on time, I remembered. 
I had to take a salad to work for a luncheon. I could have stopped by Hellmart 
on my way to work, but I really didn't have the time or the desire to do that.

I opened up my fridge and contemplated dousing the head of lettuce with ranch 
dressing and Parmesan cheese, but I was afraid of the lawsuit, because the lettuce 
was limpy and the Parmesan was putrid.

I perused the panty not really sure what I would find. I felt the spirit of Julia Child 
enter into my soul as I glanced at three cans of beans. Within five minutes I had what 
I now call the "Oh Crap! I Forgot! Salad."And at the end of the luncheon, I had an 
empty bowl to take home. What do ya know? I pulled it out just in time.




 Oh Crap! I Forgot! Salad

Three cans of beans, any kind, drained and rinsed. (My favorites are black 
 eyed peas, garbanzo beans and kidney beans. But, I've made it with chili 
beans, black beans, purple hull beans. I'm pretty sure re-fried beans would not 
work, though. Pretty sure.)

One purple onion, diced or sliced. (How much time you actually have when you 
remember that you forgot will determine how fancy you cut up your onion.)

Half a cup of Italian dressing. (Truthfully, I don't have a clue as to whether
or not it's a half cup or three-quarters of a cup. I never measure. I just pour, 
cover and shake.)

When all of your ingredients are in your salad bowl, stir well. Or put a lid 
on the bowl and shake well.

This does well when you have an hour or two to refrigerate it. It'll last for 
three days if you make it for your family and they refuse to eat beans.

The Getaway

On Mother's Day, I received flowers and an envelope. I nervously slid my finger under the flap because I expected to see flight and hotel information for the SCBWI LA conference.

Don't get me wrong: I'm not oblivious to the generosity! Garrett had pressured me to attend since I told him it was supposed to be a great conference--even better than the NY one I attended a few years ago.

When I told him I needed to finish some details on my book before it was ready to pitch, he insisted...until I compared  it to him going to the Tour de France and being almost ready to compete.

After that, I suspected he might buy me a bike.

Instead, the envelope held confirmation information for two nights at a hotel. 

Last weekend, I lost myself in the final polishing touches of my book. Meals were delivered to my door.  Garrett had even booked a massage.

Room keys for my computer and me.

Best. Gift. Ever.

At 8:52 PM on Saturday night, I celebrated the completion of Society of Legions with Hershey's kisses and a small bottle of wine.

What's your idea of a self-indulgent fantasy weekend getaway just for you?

Listen to Your Mother Show: These are my people

We send our stories into a theater packed with 400 bodies. That's 800 ears.  We send our stories into a social media project that will spread our stories to more bodies, more ears.

We can't take them back.

The house lights go up, but there is a strange combination of stage lights still shining that leave much of the crowd in the dark--at least from my view point. Applause fades to giddy conversations as cast members reunite with their people.

I stand alone onstage, peering into the gloomy abyss.

Where are my people?

A silhouette waves, and I think it's one of my tribe.  The cast member in front of me waves back.

Where are my people?  They were coming... right?

Loneliness sweeps over me as the waves of emotions the show tossed about go out to sea and come back for me--pulling me into a place that churns like a sea monster.

Then I take a deep breath.  I'm being silly. A saying drifts across my psyche: "If your ship doesn't come in, go out to meet it."

Right. Even if my people aren't here, I have a whole new sisterhood in the inaugural cast of Oklahoma City's Listen to Your Mother show. And these amazing women and man deserve to be congratulated.

I step off the stage and into this new world where everyone knows my story.

My eyes adjust to the light.  I see them.  I hear others call my name. 

I am not alone.  I never was. 

That's the thing with sisterhoods.

Some you grow up with.

childhood friends Tina and Ange--and our mommas--at the show

Some you help create.

my Inklings at Christmas--didn't get a pic after show!

Some you find through other people.

Tina, moi, Shannon, Kellie, Ange

Ashley and Jennifer at Kentucky Derby party. (They didn't wear the hats to the show.)

And some you share your soul onstage with.

2013 cast of Oklahoma City's Listen to Your Mother show (photo by Macy Fitzgerald)

Just when I feel lost at sea, my family--the ones I'm related to and the ones I've adopted--buoy me.

my hubby and kids at after-party

my mother-in-law, mom, and dad at after-party

They always do.

Even if I can't see them doing it.

Our cast was warned about the "me too" moments when strangers approach post-show and connect to your story.  I really didn't experience that.  However, I did catch people watching me, and when I looked their ways, they avoided me.  Now I know why. Since that day, I've heard from two people who told me my story helped women who were still so raw that they couldn't tell me personally.

I didn't share my secrets in vain. My story is a letter in a bottle tossed into the sea meant to be found by someone I may never meet.

That's why I did Listen to Your Mother.

Because, sometimes, it's not about me having a buoy. It's about me being the buoy.

Book Giveaway: TMI MOM by Heather Davis

If you liked Jenni McCarthy's Belly Laughs, you'll love TMI Mom: Oversharing My Life by Heather Davis.

It's fricking hilarious.

It's perfect for mommas.  

Short Chapters
Are you reading more Harold and the Purple Crayon than Fifty Shades of Grey these days? This book is for you. The pacing is quick and snappy. In the time it takes you to spray stain remover on muddy play clothes and let it set before washing, you can read a chapter. The chapter length is also great for carpooling.  While you're waiting in the car to collect your tot/tike/teen from an activity, you can read a chapter and then greet your offspring with a big smile on your face.

Kindred Spirit
Someone else knows. You're not alone in this mommy gig. Maybe you've never peed in the shower, but you can certainly identify with hiding from the wee ones when you want to have a phone conversation. And you probably understand the value of paying a babysitter to go on a date--only to end up at "Hellmart."

Heather Davis tells true stories about family life. Other people run out of clean drinking glasses.  Other moms have mommas who question the propriety of their undergarment choices. It's comforting to know someone else walks in momma shoes.

Guaranteed Laughs
Read with caution. Choose reading places wisely. I enjoy Heather's blog at Minivan Momma, but I wasn't prepared for the laugh snorts in store for me.  On more than one occasion, I nearly woke my family from laughing so hard.

This book is about full disclosure. I giggled through her conversations with her editor in notes. Don't you wonder what sort of conversations go into creating a book? I love the insider feeling of reading their comments in parenthetical.

Free!
Here's your chance to read it for free.  From one momma to another, I'd like to give you an autographed copy. Give it to another momma. Give it to your momma.

How do I get this book?
Simply comment on this post by telling me something about yo' momma.

Contest ends Wednesday, May 8.

That Show I'm Going to Be In

The outpouring of support from friends and family for making Oklahoma City's inaugural Listen to Your Mother Show has been tremendous.

Still, a lot of people have never heard of it.

Ann Imig, the head momma herself talks about it here:


It's an easy concept that creates a beautiful and authentic experience.

As I sat in a hair salon with foil in my hair and showed YouTube videos of past performances from my iPad, I realized that that was the true essence of the show. Women hanging out and sharing stories.

Two of our directors were in the Northwest Arkansas show last year.

Proceed with caution: After you watch the videos, you may have the compulsion to share them with others.

Heather Davis talks about unmentionables hair accessories.


Misti Prior talks about pretending to be Mother Teresa.


Today, the website introduced moi. 

Here's a teaser that shows the rest of our cast.  Hint: I'm the toothless one.


10% of proceeds benefits Infant Crisis Services in OKC. We're also accepting diaper donations at the door. Tickets are still available. You can order yours here.

Bring some Huggies and someone to hug. It's going to be that kind of afternoon.

Cheer for Your Team

I'm not very good at the preschool athletic mentality. 
1.  Every kid is not the Most Valuable Player.
2.  Each game should have a winner and a loser.

That's life. 

Don't get me wrong. Winning isn't everything, but losing doesn't mean hanging up your sneakers, either.  When you fall, brush yourself off, quit your crying, and get back in the game. It's important to always do your personal best because your only real competition is yourself.

I was a cheerleader--the kind that believed more in the job than the uniform.  I disdain the "spirit leaders" who leave when rain or sleet falls from the sky. If the team can still play, then they can still cheer.

12th grade: front and center in a parka in the pouring rain

After a few adult beverages, I'm willing to dance my high school's fight song.

Go Bulldogs!

 

Last month,  I put my dormant cheer skills to use and cheered myself on through my own special version of March Madness.

Here are the rules: If a writing opportunity presented itself, I must enter the competition.

Even if I doubted my abilities--especially so--I must take action. With failure comes wisdom. With wisdom comes success.

Want to know how the brackets turned out?

I submitted my essays to two Listen to Your Mother shows.  Instead of submitting to one show, I embraced March Madness and submitted to two.

Two! Two! We want two!

And, well, you know how that turned out. Read about it here and here.

Gooooo team!

Then, I tried Brenda Drake's agent contest.  My cheerleader was still asleep when I dragged myself out of bed to submit early in the morning.  Right before I pushed send on my carefully written entry of my novel's first 250 words and 35-word pitch, I doubted myself.  I changed the pitch.

I did not make the next round.

That's all right. That's okay. We're gonna win another day!

Then another opportunity presented itself. Mini Vaughn, one of the slush zombies for the contest, volunteered to critique the pitches on her blog Dirty Silly Things.  I thought, "Oh my. I can't put myself out there and face rejection again. It's so public. She even says something about spanking us and making it hurt."  *Blushes* 

My cheerleader gave me a high-kick in the butt.  

Be aggressive! B-E Aggressive! B-E- A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E! Be aggressive! B-E aggressive!

Because she was an obnoxiously perky, insistent little inner cheerleader, I not only sent the rejected logline, but I also submitted the one I'd planned to send. If I was going to get a smackdown, I might as well really feel the pain, right?

The critique wasn't painful at all. She thought the original pitch was "fantastic." Lesson learned.  My biggest opponent is self-doubt. 

Defense! (clap, clap) Defense! (clap, clap)

Over the month, I had a couple of contest triumphs and forfeited one opportunity. The point is that I put myself in the game.

I'm gearing up for submitting my freshly revised novel to agents. I've listened to agents who seemed excited about the story but rejected it. I've rewritten the novel and improved my game. 

First (clap) and ten! Go! Fight! Win!

Why compete? Because someone has to win.  Why can't it be me?  Or you?

  Dribble it! Pass it! (clap) We want a basket!

Have you stepped outside your comfort zone lately? What would you like to achieve?  

Go for it!

Listen to your personal cheerleader and take the challenge. Let me know what it is.

I'm already waggling my spirit fingers for you.

Listen to Your Mother

"Do you need me to go with you?" Mama asked.

Um. No. My facial expression was likely reminiscent of my teenage years.

"Don't look at me like that.  Your dad is worried. Everyone knows you get lost."

True. But I'm not incompetent. I'm a reasonably intelligent, somewhat independent wife and mother-of-two.

And I'd made a call back for Listen to Your Mother! Oh, yeah.

I could drive to a simple audition by myself.  Probably.

I'd leave early.

If I drove alone to the audition for Listen to Your Mother--Northwest Arkansas, I'd get about three hours BY MYSELF. My fantasy life took hold and I dreamed: No crying. No food fights. No one needing me at all.  I'd go to my son's soccer game, drive the windy, crooked road through the foothills of the Ozarks,  audition for the NW Arkansas show Listen to Your Mother, and return in time to take the kids to a Hot Wheels party.

Yep. This mama was going places.

Giddiness prevailed until I received another email. It was a callback for the inaugural show of Listen to Your Mother--Oklahoma City. My home state.  Good news. But my heart fell when I read one little line in the email.  I would not be able to audition if I made the NW Arkansas show.

And that made me anxious.

I liked my essay for NW Arkansas.  But the piece for Oklahoma City... was my story.  I didn't realize how important it was to me until that email told me I might not get the opportunity to share it.

When I saw the amazing cast list for Arkansas, relief flooded me. My name wasn't on it.

I got to tell my story!  It might be only once in front of the captive audience of directors and producer, but I. Would. Share. My. Story.

And that made me nervous. Because I wanted to tell everyone.

So, when my mother said, "Do you need me to go with you?" I said, "No."

I didn't need her to go. But it might be nice. "But if you want to spend the day together, I'd love to have you along."

"I'll drive," she said, "so you can practice."

Half an hour into our drive, I read the piece.  Only a few lines in, her hand flew off the steering wheel to get my attention. "Stop."

She offered advice. Good advice. Before the audition, I read the piece for her three or four times. She commented and critiqued. The rhythm was familiar--reminding us both of when I was in high school and she'd help me run lines for a show or a competition.

When I walked inside the building for my audition, I didn't feel like a child who'd been driven by her mother.  I felt like a woman with a story to tell.

And, boy, I was a wreck.  All heart palpitations and nervous chatter. The directors and producers were kind women, willing me to do my best.  They wanted to hear my story as much as I wanted to tell it.

Afterward, my mom and I ate, shopped, and headed home. We laughed and talked without life interrupting us until my phone rang.  I didn't recognize the number.

"Hello?"

It was Heather. One of the directors. She claimed she wanted me to get some sleep and informed me I made the show!

I babbled a response, my emotions busy tumbling over each other for attention. Happiness. Relief.  Excitement.

When I hung up the phone, I could tell by the look on my mom's face that she knew.

Sometimes you need to listen to your gut.

Sometimes it's best to listen to your mother.

Come see our show on May 5 at the Will Rogers Theater in Oklahoma City. Tickets are available here. Listen to Your Mother OKC benefits Infant Crisis Services.